New York: John Dory Oyster Bar

The John Dory is the restaurant you want to hate. There's the gaudy, overblown decor (think one of those aquatic-themed bathrooms meets country club prep meets no taste). The prices are very high, and the portions very small. The clientele can only be described as obnoxious, and the staff is deliberately apathetic (case in point: the sullen hostess insisted on repeatedly calling my companion "Stephanie" despite the fact that we had corrected her several times in the span of thirty minutes). It is also cramped and uncomfortable, bordering on claustrophobic. Really, the whole restaurant is just like one giant douche. But irritatingly enough, like so many of the egotistical asshats we know and love to hate, it's actually good at what it does. The Kanye West of restaurants, if you will. At its core, the John Dory does great seafood. For such an achingly hip place, the food is surprisingly fresh, simple and good, tinkered with only slightly, so that the natural flavors of the ingredients shine through. It is not overwrought, as you would expect the menu of the newest restaurant in the Ace Hotel to be.

Razor clam ceviche

Sea bream with Meyer lemon and Thai chili

Oysters, East and West coast

Cold poached lobster with tomalley vinaigrette

Whelks with garlic and butter

Take an appetizer of razor clam ceviche. It isn't the most attractive of plates, but the raw clam, simply dressed with an intensely grassy olive oil and maybe a bit of citrus, is soft and sweet. A crudo of sea bream with Meyer lemon and Thai chili offers a firm, clean bite, and ends on a luxurious note. The John Dory has excellent oysters (and at $3 a pop, they should be). Well-shucked, with meticulously clean shells, they are best adorned with just a squeeze of lemon. The lobster is fresh and well-poached, the richness of the tomalley modulated by a bit of acidity.

Chorizo stuffed squid with smoked tomato

Oyster pan roast with uni crostini

Things stay perturbingly on course as you navigate through hot side of the menu, starting with a wonderfully smoky chorizo stuffed squid. Tender hollows of squid are filled with hearty paella rice and nubs of sausage and nestled on a mound of white beans and creme fraiche. Smoked tomatoes add a smoldering acidic sweetness. The stock in an oyster pan roast could use a tad more seafood flavor but all that sherry and cream are lovely when sopped up with the accompanying crostini slathered with petals of uni butter or one of the John Dory's crusty, buttery Parker House rolls (which must be ordered separately). And the oysters in said pan roast? They are gently simmered to a slippery smoothness, best eaten with a spoon and some of that creamy broth.

Eccles cake

Grapefruit curd with ginger shortbread

Dessert is not a strong point. Eccles cake, an English dessert comprised of currants in a somewhat stiff flaky pastry and topped with ripe Stilton, was hesitantly described as "interesting, but good" by our server (waiter speak for, "Don't order it.") I was forced to parrot back this same lie when he came by to ask me how it was. The currants are cloyingly sweet, with an underlying mustiness, and the blue cheese doesn't help matters. The grapefruit curd with ginger shortbread was a welcome reprieve, and a nice twist on the usual lemon rendition, but nothing particularly special.

So, by all means, go. But keep in mind that the John Dory is a restaurant best approached with the kind of jovial, easygoing attitude that eludes so many of its patrons and employees. This is not the place to go when you are feeling irritable, impatient or ugly. Don't take it (or yourself) too seriously, and you'll have a grand time. Who knows? Remain unflappably cheerful throughout dinner and you may be rewarded with a grim smile from your server as you pay your bill.

John Dory Oyster Bar at the Ace Hotel

1196 Broadway

(between 28th and 29th St.)

New York, NY 10001

Phone: (212) 792-9000

Best dishes: Razor clam ceviche, oyster pan roast, Parker house rolls, cold poached lobster, oysters, chorizo stuffed squid

Hours: Open seven days a week, 12pm-2am. No reservations taken unless you are a guest of the Ace Hotel. Wait times usually very long, particularly after 7pm. Best bet is to go early.

Things to know: Oyster happy hour everyday from 5pm-7pm.